- The couple, who spent eight months living apart, are back together again.
- Sanaa Akhand told Insider that she and her husband, Adnan, fell into a rut after seven years of marriage.
- They now share a place in California, but Sana says they will live separately again.
Sana and Adnan Akhand tied the knot in their early twenties and have been together for less than seven years. Sana’aShe, 32, told Insider in February that she and her husband witnessed their marriage fall into a rut. In an attempt to save their relationship, they decide to live in different homes and manage their finances separately.
Sana said they envisioned marriage as they retained their independence; They did not want to slip into the traditional roles of husband and wife. But the opposite happened.
Sanaa’s story Viral on TikTok In January, a video she shared has racked up over 1.5 million views as of Friday. The couple agreed to live apart for a maximum of three years, but decided to get back together in June – eight months of experience – after he started a new job on the West Coast.
Speaking to Insider from her new rental in Los Angeles, California, Sana said the distance made the heart fond and she would never say no to living apart again.
She said Adnan “changed a lot”. On top of appreciating her more, she said he became “more affectionate and loving.” She added that traditional marriage dynamics could become “outdated”. Living apart from Adnan has reignited their intimacy, their passion and “their enthusiasm to be together again”.
With their new residence on the West Coast, Sana said they plan to live a bi-coastal life with homes in New York City and Los Angeles. You still have the option to live separately again.
“Part of it makes me wonder if living together right now is a test,” Sana said, noting that she is writing a book about women, relationships, and self-love. “Is more space going to make it better and easier? Or is this just a way of life that people can and should do?”
She added that the only scenario in which they would stay in the same house for a long time was the children. “If we had kids, we would definitely live together full time,” Sana said. “Don’t do it alone.”
Sana says that returning to live together has its challenges
After spending months living separately, the process of getting back together was an “adjustment,” according to Sana.
She explained that at first they were excited to get back together and spend every day with each other. But after three weeks, Sana began to feel “totally exhausted” and slipped into old habits, such as Adnan preparing lunch and dinner every day. She said she was depressed and didn’t feel like she used to.
“I stopped doing all the things I had learned over the past eight months and said I would never do them again,” she said.
She and Adnan decided to set “boundaries” so that they both had independent time. Sana said she wanted more time alone and with her friends.
“Monday through Thursday, we do our own business,” she said. When Adnan works late, she said she takes these days to pursue her hobbies of drawing and painting.
Weekends spent together.
“Friday nights, we cook dinner together; on Saturdays, the phones are away,” she said.
While it’s not easy to distance yourself from the person you love, Sana said she’s “actively working to make sure I don’t make it completely my world.”
Another challenge was to come to terms with her family members, who she said did not understand why she and Adnan were separated. She added that family members were affected by the negative opinions of strangers who commented on their lifestyle on social media.
“They let what other people say get to them,” Sana said. “Facing societal norms will make people uncomfortable, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t do it.”